It's been a long while.

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I left all this music here for you to listen to while you read my post...I was listening to some of these songs while I wrote it. It will make the reading a bit better !! Thank you so much for reading about what's been up!!!!
It's been quite a while shince I wrote about my experiences. I guesss since the last time I took a great trip that involved lots and lots of fun climbing was in 2010....Well I didn't waste too much time.
Over the course of a year a few major events have happened.
First Major event: I injured my knee. I was doing a heel hook at the Vertical Hold Sport Climbing Center http://verticalhold.com/ . I tore a ligament in the inside part of my leg. I literally was taking two small handholds (crimps for all you climbers) and using all my weight to lever myself to the next hold. I perched on my right heel to the point my right hip was touching the wall. My leg snapped.
That was a great deal of fun. NOT!
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Moving to San Francisco: Shortly after my injury I decided to keep up with exploring (which was always more important than climbing hard grades to me) I always knew that the best way to improve your climbing was to climb as many types of rock as possible. It's true....no matter if I was onsighting 12 c out in Rifle...and then hit the boulders in Southern Illinois I wasn't onsighting v6. It just didn't work. So I went to San Francisco to actually find a settling point. I ended up taking a break from climbing to let my knee start to heal...
I started to use my downtime in more non-productive ways. I began to party much more than I ever had. I enjoyed the city enviornment for it's adverse opportunities and cool bars and total melting pot culture. I used this opportunity to roam the city doing art and finding new 'friends'. What I didn't realize is that all of this partying would lead to a more destructive point in my life. One that I wish I could have taken back.
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I found myself falling. There was no rope to hold onto. My occupation was slowly dwindling, most people didn't want to hang around with me, and I spent most of this time by myself...My refuge was the bar where people seemed to be understanding of insanity. (alcoholism as far as I'm concerned is insanity....to continue drinking (in an uncontrolled way) while being somewhat aware of the destruction your causing yourself currently and in the future is so destructive.
I love the city. I lived in the Tenderloin...some may know this as the area you just don't walk after dark...But I lived there. The TL is going through a dentrification process...where the local upper class and middle class people are beginning to move in and restore some economy to the area (ussually with art shows from a lot of young aspiring artists) . The area is mostly known for the Federal Government housing and the inability for such to provide a safe haven for those earning there checks on social security. The idea behind this is that the months rent ussually sucks their money dry and for the rest of their month they are returned to a $0 basis leading to disease, horrible living conditions, drugs, prostitution, street life, and death.
On the up note...I did see the Giants win the World Series! "So as long as we have 'bread and circus'...Society will survive" Thanks Julias Ceaser
I worked for two companies while in San Francisco... A political campaign organization called
http://grassrootscampaigns.com/ and http://greenpeace.org/ .
If your looking for some work and want to benefit a cause...and are not sure how to help...Get with it.'
I moved back to San Diego where I became involved in the same vicious cycle of abusing alcohol. All I am willing to expose over the internet is that this damaging hobby was starting to really affet my relationships, how I conducted my self personally, and my run ins with authority. I began to realize I was DESTIN for death, jail, or a mental institution. I truly believed that...and that sad fact was....Is I didn't care...and wanted to.
http:// My Recovery: My life had began to take shapes of an unkown form, out a the norm. In a whirl whind caught in the storm. I was in a rock and a hard place. One's that used to admire me and hold me true as friends began to dissapear behind the shade trees (shady people) that started to be important in my life. Respect to all the people reading this who I hurt and I was mean to during his moment in my life.
My freedom was threatened and my mother came to me and expressed my need to get well. I am an alcoholic. I hit rock bottom and freedom was no where in sight.
I decided to surrender and get help. I came to Florida to get more insight into what was happening to me. I have a disease. The disease is alcoholism.

The water is warm here, the water is salty, and the girls are beautiful. The weather is sticky, the pavement is hot, the sun is hotter. The walls are painted, the place is far from home, I miss the trees , I miss the past, I am hopeful for the future. The frogs jump here, the lizards are quick, the faces are strange, the languages diverse, the beaches are nude, my face is clear. My thoughts race, I have found a god, I am being taught, I am teaching others, my future is becoming more clear. The streets are trash, the water hits the pavement, the fungus grows. I have a bible now. I rarely read it. I pray, I am imperfect, I am being used. I am being used to be more perfect. God talks through me..God talks through you. I am not afraid. I am strong when I am weak. I am weaker when I am strong. I am open minded. I have finished a few books. I am working the steps. I have made decisions for my future. I have a foundation for life. Life has a foundation for me. I don't want you. I don't want anyone. I want me....back. I'm Back.

I am looking forward to the time I lost drowning. Good thing It didn't take me any longer.
I am looking forward to all the things that I could not complete while I my disease over the past 15 years has taken away.
I am looking forward to be able to look at you and geniunly smile. I am looking forward to you looking back at me...and genuinely smiling back. I can't wait to smell the mountain air. To get in the water at six AM glass. I am looking forward to painting. I look forward to meeting new people. I look forward to meeting someone when I least expect it.
I am looking forward to life. Finally being able to live. I look forward to being able to sincerely listen. I am looking forward to the future and what it holds.
I am gonna go over to the gym right now and do some training to get back into climbing now. I will be sure to update my blog frequently now...So if you can ....subscribe and thanks for reading!!!!
-Scott

P.S. I would have put more of the songs I was listening to up but....This damn internet...